Speak it Out

[GS8]

Originally Posted by GS8

It's Friday night so I'm gonna give a little update here regarding the first girl. This thread needs to keep going.

So this first girl I mentioned. She tries pretty hard to protect her true thoughts but she slipped today.

She basically let out how fed up she is getting of her work arrangement. She's a TFW from the Philippines and is living with and working for her sister. It sounds like a sweet gig but apparently becoming too much for her as even on her days off, she basically gets kidnapped by her family 'because flips' so she has no free will to go places on her own and *cough* meet other people.

I asked her when her contract was over and she said Mar 2023

I feel bad for her as she's really a nice person. She's just trapped right now. She's already late to life, has to endure this and will be even further behind as her education she obtained in the Philippines is irrelevant here. She needs to start again. It was just interesting to see her just blurt it out after hiding it so well for so long (I've known her since pre-Covid).

Of course she's in a tight spot. Can't fight with family / your employer. I empathize with her especially since my own family's gene pool can fit in a thimble.

I am NOT getting involved. She's just talking with me and slowly letting things out. I have no plans to get involved. Right now we're just friends talking, nothing more. She just needs someone outside of her family as she has no one. Her fragility is showing more and more.

I will not abandon her in this state.

/Spoke out

Update to this:

We met this past Saturday as she wanted to. We met from 3pm to 3am. We talked a ton. We had some plans but ended up talking, eating and drinking. Went to the Boathouse but came back for more talking. There was nothing sexual here at all.

She opened up more about her life and she admitted to me that she's stuck in her 'life' for another 1.5 years. She literally can't do anything until her contract is over. She has a lot of life experience but is 'frozen in time' so to speak. I felt bad for her but understood her duties towards attaining PR. I do wish there was a faster option for her but oh well.

Towards the end of our time, I was massaging her legs and feet (I am not an RMT) and she said how much she loved it as she starts melting into my couch, smiling and gently moaning. I kept at it because as I was doing it, I was playing back all the messages in my mind that she sent me about being exhausted, frustrated, busy etc. so I felt she deserved this moment in time (it helps that my building is super quiet).

She repositioned herself and lay her head on my lap as I gently stroked her head while singing a Leonard Cohen song. She fell asleep for 10 minutes. I let her me. When she woke up, she was a bit miffed (at herself) but from there I took her home. She had to wake up at 7am to start work again.

She's so used to serving other people that the fact I served her that night threw off her universal balance but, later, she understood, she was super thankful and grateful for what I did.

It's been an interesting journey. From blind couple, to romantic interest to time apart, to valued friends and now even closer friends. I'm not disrupting the flow we have. It would be VERY hard (and aggravating) to pursue a relationship with her so I'm not riding down that avenue yet. However, when she told me she has no friends here, That broke my heart. I told her 'yes you do. You're looking at one'. She had a deep smile on her face so I knew that even if we don't date, we'll have a deep loving connection to each other.

Spoiler!

YouTube

[BIC_BAWS]

The simping in this thread is disgusting

Sent from my SM-G781W using Tapatalk

[mikemhg]

You have to be trolling at this point. You sang a Leonard Cohen song as she fell asleep?

Whether serious or not, that gave me a good laugh, especially BIC's post thereafter.

OH BOY

[ilovebacon]

Originally Posted by GS8

Update to this:

We met this past Saturday as she wanted to. We met from 3pm to 3am. We talked a ton. We had some plans but ended up talking, eating and drinking. Went to the Boathouse but came back for more talking. There was nothing sexual here at all.

She opened up more about her life and she admitted to me that she's stuck in her 'life' for another 1.5 years. She literally can't do anything until her contract is over. She has a lot of life experience but is 'frozen in time' so to speak. I felt bad for her but understood her duties towards attaining PR. I do wish there was a faster option for her but oh well.

Towards the end of our time, I was massaging her legs and feet (I am not an RMT) and she said how much she loved it as she starts melting into my couch, smiling and gently moaning. I kept at it because as I was doing it, I was playing back all the messages in my mind that she sent me about being exhausted, frustrated, busy etc. so I felt she deserved this moment in time (it helps that my building is super quiet).

She repositioned herself and lay her head on my lap as I gently stroked her head while singing a Leonard Cohen song. She fell asleep for 10 minutes. I let her me. When she woke up, she was a bit miffed (at herself) but from there I took her home. She had to wake up at 7am to start work again.

She's so used to serving other people that the fact I served her that night threw off her universal balance but, later, she understood, she was super thankful and grateful for what I did.

It's been an interesting journey. From blind couple, to romantic interest to time apart, to valued friends and now even closer friends. I'm not disrupting the flow we have. It would be VERY hard (and aggravating) to pursue a relationship with her so I'm not riding down that avenue yet. However, when she told me she has no friends here, That broke my heart. I told her 'yes you do. You're looking at one'. She had a deep smile on her face so I knew that even if we don't date, we'll have a deep loving connection to each other.

Spoiler!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wUak...ardCohen-Topic

You got her worked up by massaging her and didn't give her the D..

[Euro7r]

^Bruhhhh not even a hand job at least?

[TOS'd]

Step-bro?

[PK-EK]

this is just a bad Filipino soap opera

[BlackV62K2]

So basically friend-zoned now?

[Euro7r]

Why is it in human-nature people gotta like chirp in their fucking perspective in how someone "SHOULD OUGHT" to live life? Like if you don't do A-B-C-D in sequence then it's apparently WRONG. Who the fuck even dictated what is right and wrong in how someone should live life? Also why the fuck does it concern anyone how anyone lives their life? If it's your friend, they should be supportive regardless what decision is made, and not rather chime in their fucking own opinion that ain't supportive.

[Traum]

If I were to comment on this ^^, does that count as "chirping in my fxxking perspective in how someone else might be living their life" too?

For a lot of people, keeping their mouths shut is an acquired skill, and not a lot of people can master that -- myself included LOL~ Otherwise, I wouldn't be commenting here now...

[instantneedles]

It’s been awhile, so Imma give an update. Had a great first date last week. It’s been awhile since I’ve had such a stellar first date experience.

Was it enough for a second one? Likely not - but what matters more to me is that I am enjoying the process.

[6793026]

^atta boy.
even if there is no second date, you're enjoying the process! awesome my man.

[6793026]

Originally Posted by Euro7r

Why is it in human-nature people gotta like chirp in their fucking perspective in how someone "SHOULD OUGHT" to live life? Like if you don't do A-B-C-D in sequence then it's apparently WRONG. Who the fuck even dictated what is right and wrong in how someone should live life? Also why the fuck does it concern anyone how anyone lives their life? If it's your friend, they should be supportive regardless what decision is made, and not rather chime in their fucking own opinion that ain't supportive.

It's a double edged sword. Yes I could have gotten married in my 20s. I could have travelled the world on cruise ships and scuba dive as an instructor, heck, I could have fly to germany and married my summer love.... thank GOD for bro's telling me to think twice....

Long story short, looking back, if I married any one of my last gf, i would have been in shit.

[Euro7r]

Originally Posted by 6793026

It's a double edged sword. Yes I could have gotten married in my 20s. I could have travelled the world on cruise ships and scuba dive as an instructor, heck, I could have fly to germany and married my summer love.... thank GOD for bro's telling me to think twice....

Long story short, looking back, if I married any one of my last gf, i would have been in shit.

I think if we always looked back in hindsight in life, we'll always feel we could have been way ahead in life or way behind (depending on the circumstances). I just hate when people think everyone should follow a set of steps in life in order and that is the "RIGHT" way to do things. These idiots never ever been in that situation or my shoes, how the fuck would they know what is right or wrong. It's like one of those people you know that grew up in a well raised disciplined family where one is told to do things A-B-C-D in sequence and if you do things out of sequence, then you are labelled as a bad child and you aren't accepted.

[Traum]

Ugh... that awkward feeling of seeing cropped out parts of your ex on the social media of another guy, and instantly recognizing with 99.99% certainty that it was your ex...

At least I can take comfort in knowing that she is in good hands now. But there is still this part of me that is aching... just aching from from how we had gone on our separate ways, even though we have both found our new happy lives without one another...

I just don't think I'm gonna be able to sleep well tonight...

[6793026]

^ eyah, when i was young i used to feel the same and surprisingly I still feel the same here.

I do the cop out way, i remove them from my social media... so it makes it easier... in my mind. After like 5 yrs... then i'm definitely over it.

[mikemhg]

That's interesting. How long has the breakup been? If it's more then a year, you have to move on. If anything, if things ended amicably, you should be happy they found someone and are content.

If she fucked you over though, well that's another story

[Traum]

Originally Posted by mikemhg

That's interesting. How long has the breakup been? If it's more then a year, you have to move on. If anything, if things ended amicably, you should be happy they found someone and are content.

I am happy that she is with someone who will likely take good care of her, and that they are having fun. I really am. And I wish all my ex'es could be like that too, because I specifically know a few who didn't turn out like that.

If she fucked you over though, well that's another story

I can only interpret this in one way with fond memories, and unfortunately, it isn't a story I can share...

[Euro7r]

Maybe I'm the lone star out there that feels this way. Since I was born I always lived with my grandparents (they took care of me growing up) and reciprocated by watching over them as I got older (until they they passed away), and parents. Now that I got a condo and moved out, I don't feel happy due to the sentimental attachment with my parents. It's that family "cohesive-ness" emotion where that family togetherness aspect feels like it's stripped away. Not everyone mesh with their parents and want to move out ASAP, I am the opposite where I enjoy seeing parents everyday and knowing they are healthy and well (brings a sense of joy in my life). At this point in life, it's depressing to see parents in a house by themselves (literally could sleep in a different room every day for them lol).

I am giving myself one-year at the condo and then evaluate my priorities. Such as after I get married and have kids, move home so parents can help watch the kids etc.

[6793026]

^ I feel for ya. Grandma just passed away few weeks ago and my uncle's family of 6 were all taken care of by grandma.

Let's see how these gen X would show up at her funeral. I'm one of the few who flew back and took park of quarantine just to be in the funeral.

[tdeweyn]

Originally Posted by Euro7r

Maybe I'm the lone star out there that feels this way. Since I was born I always lived with my grandparents (they took care of me growing up) and reciprocated by watching over them as I got older (until they they passed away), and parents. Now that I got a condo and moved out, I don't feel happy due to the sentimental attachment with my parents. It's that family "cohesive-ness" emotion where that family togetherness aspect feels like it's stripped away. Not everyone mesh with their parents and want to move out ASAP, I am the opposite where I enjoy seeing parents everyday and knowing they are healthy and well (brings a sense of joy in my life). At this point in life, it's depressing to see parents in a house by themselves (literally could sleep in a different room every day for them lol).

I am giving myself one-year at the condo and then evaluate my priorities. Such as after I get married and have kids, move home so parents can help watch the kids etc.

I feel you. I was never in a rush to move out but somehow ended up doing so in my early 20's. Sometimes I feel like I want to rent out my place and just move back with them, but seeing that I am nearing my 30's... Not likely. Just visit them often. I make it my priority to see them for dinner every Sunday.

[Presto]

My sister got married, and was fortunate to move back home shortly after their first baby was born. They took a third of the main floor and reno'd it to a full suite to live in. My mom is almost 74, but still has good energy, and motivation, to help take care of two boys (3 and 1). My dad helps out as best he can, but he mainly drives my BIL up the wall. Fortunately, my BIL can retreat to his man-cave garage.

[GS8]

I was talking to co-workers before we all split up for the holiday break.

Person A:

"I have 6 gatherings to go to. Two before Christmas, one on Christmas and three around New Years. I will be socially exhausted from all these parties. It's just too many people to handle. It's fun but maybe for 2 hours tops."

Person B:

"I don't have anyone in my life. My family crumbled and all my friends are busy with theirs. I think I'll buy myself a couple of gifts and open them up at Christmas."

If only Person A and Person B would swap so they can experience the opposite of what they routinely experience and then share their stories afterward. I doubt Person A would want to go another season roleplaying as Person B.

But damn, listening to Person B just hurt...

[Mr.Money]

Person B might be enjoying the peace & hobby's.


I'm also an introvert and i cannot stand useless conversations unless its intelligent or whatever hobby i love doing.

[CivicBlues]

Hope Person A gets his/her hands on a rapid test soon.