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Relationship & Gender DiscussionTHIS SPACE OPEN FOR ADVERTISEMENT. YOU SHOULD BE ADVERTISING HERE! The thin line between love and hate
Mature discussion about understanding the opposite sex...
with your sexy lines, that big butt with them round tail lights, that 6spd shifter and that transaxle in the back you are everything i need and more. SO WHY AREN'T YOU IN MY LIFE YET?
^
Sounds like an excellent idea I'd pursue that, what could go wrong?
__________________
The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place... and I donīt care how tough you are, it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently, if you let it. You, me or nobody, is gonna hit as hard as life. But ain't about how hard you hit... It's about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward... how much you can take, and keep moving forward. Thatīs how winning is done. Now, if you know what you worth, go out and get what you worth. - Rocky Balboa
Fuck, one of my high school classmates recently died. Although I never really was close to him, he was super nice, funny and a good person with a good heart. It's crazy how delicate life is, cherish it and enjoy it to the max. Rest in peace.
sometimes, silence is golden. that said, shut the fuck up.
__________________ "There's a lot of dead people who had the right of way." "Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience." "I have a lot of beliefs, and I live by none of them. They're just my beliefs, they make me feel good about who I am. But if they get in the way of a thing I want, like I wanna jack off or something, I just do that."
TBT to one year ago...disneyland, vegas, socal
Woke up remembering you
Thank you for the 5 years
__________________
Sometimes we tend to be in despair when the person we love leaves us, but the truth is, it's not our loss, but theirs, for they left the only person who couldn't give up on them.
Make the effort and take the risk..
"Do what you feel in your heart to be right- for you'll be criticized anyway. You'll be damned if you do, and damned if you don't." - Eleanor Roosevelt
Last edited by tiger_handheld; 07-16-2015 at 08:23 AM.
I don't think it's possible to come back from what I've done. I have lost you forever. Someone that I saw the future so clearly with... now wants to destroy my future and wants nothing to do with me.
^I'd rather give 60k than talk to a wall. Fuck, I feel like giving up.
__________________ There's a phallic symbol infront of my car
Quote:
MG1: in fact, a new term needs to make its way into the American dictionary. Trump............ he's such a "Trump" = ultimate insult. Like, "yray, you're such a trump."
bcrdukes yray fucked bcrdukes up the nose
dapperfied yraisis
dapperfied yray so waisis
FastAnna you literally talk out your ass
FastAnna i really cant
FastAnna yray i cant stand you
I don't think it's possible to come back from what I've done. I have lost you forever. Someone that I saw the future so clearly with... now wants to destroy my future and wants nothing to do with me.
You're the one who made me feel the most welcomed when I first started working here and now you're lobbying for my dismissal for one mistake. Normally I'd say "fuck you bitch", but its my fault for having hopes up. My fault to once believing I was a part of something and not just another guy. There is disappointment only because there was hope
Fucking exhausted. 2 months until September when FT work and FT nightschool starts. It's time to just sit back, and quietly enjoy this summer. Goodbye people, I'll be MIA at night for awhile.
Lately just been content with life. Still busy but slowing down everything for this last 7 weeks.
__________________
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[17-03, 09:23] Amuro Ray is it normal for my dick to have things growing on it?
Quote:
[15-05, 13:34] FastAnna You guise are like diet coke and I am the mentos
[15-05, 13:34] FastAnna Incredible. How easy it is.
Quote:
Originally Posted by murd0c
I'm scared of spiders... When I see one I toss my cats at it
"What exactly do you want? You say you really want to see me and I make time for you, then you just bail last minute. Am i some accessory to you? Seriously, don't waste my time" /rant
__________________ There's a phallic symbol infront of my car
Quote:
MG1: in fact, a new term needs to make its way into the American dictionary. Trump............ he's such a "Trump" = ultimate insult. Like, "yray, you're such a trump."
bcrdukes yray fucked bcrdukes up the nose
dapperfied yraisis
dapperfied yray so waisis
FastAnna you literally talk out your ass
FastAnna i really cant
FastAnna yray i cant stand you
Sign gf parents want 60k for the marriage (Chinese).
you have to pay the parents to marry the gf?
so the parents are selling their daughter?
did i read that right?
__________________
Sometimes we tend to be in despair when the person we love leaves us, but the truth is, it's not our loss, but theirs, for they left the only person who couldn't give up on them.
Make the effort and take the risk..
"Do what you feel in your heart to be right- for you'll be criticized anyway. You'll be damned if you do, and damned if you don't." - Eleanor Roosevelt
reads most threads with his pants around his ankles, especially in the Forced Induction forum.
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Vancouver
Posts: 10,645
Thanked 2,191 Times in 1,131 Posts
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tiger_handheld
you have to pay the parents to marry the gf?
so the parents are selling their daughter?
did i read that right?
Quote:
Originally Posted by 6793026
60k as a wedding gift? i would tell them to fook off.
45-50k for a good 30 tables in chinese restaurant
5-10k ring
5-8k for wedding videos etc.
what's this 60k they are asking.
Well in most Chinese Culture the guys family usually give the girls family some money. This is done because the parents of the daughter raise the daughter up which cost money and now she is marry and will now help carry the guys' family man (assuming they have a baby and the baby last name will follow the guys family). The girls family wants something in return for raising their daughter up.
Times have change since then and from I gather in the past few years in China when the guy pays the girl family, the girl family will also give the guy family equal value of what he guys pay in the form of a new car, electronics for the new house, maybe down payment for their house depending on how much money they ask for.
For my case if they want 60k they will have to give me 60k of items. It is really dumb in a sense you literally gain nothing other than bragging rights to their family and friends how much they got. In reality they still have to pay that money out. Now I am little different because she is in China and I am in Vancouver so if I give her parents any money I don't expect them to give me anything in return as it would be really difficult for them to ship say a car or any electronics. Actually I don't want anything from them. They aren't exactly rich themselves (they live in a rural area of China) her brother got an apartment in the city boarder of Beijing. My guess is that mom wants the money tho help her brother pays for the mortgage of the apartment. Or they feel they get a ton for their daughter since she graduated form university. I am sorry but almost anyone can graduate from university these days. So is nothing special. They also don't understand that once their daughter arrive in Vancouver she ain't going to be making any money for at least 6months to a year till she goes to school and learn something or get use to Vancouver. i have no doubt her English is so so can get by since she study English but by no means is good. So even after a few years of working I don't feel she will be able to get a high paying job here which is fine.
Now what they don't realize times have change. I have a few friends who got marry here (from China as well) and the girl family didn't even ask for any money from the guy because they only want their daughter to be happy. They also don't realize there is something call "Internet" so is very very easy to search for wedding trends in China (In fact there is a website that list how much money you should give to the girls family according to the city they are from) and her city falls really back on the list and most people offer $4k to $10k) again this depends on what the girl side is given (sometimes the girl side gets nothing if the guy have to pay for everything wedding, apartment, car etc etc).
The excuse they give for asking for this much money also doesn't make any sense. First they say they will miss their daughter and won't get to see her often (often as in every other day or everyweek). Knowing my gf have been studying in another city for over 4years and she only goes back to visit once a year, I explain she can go back to visit every year as well when she is in Van so it makes little to no difference when she was in university. Then they said they are scare the marriage won't work out and their daughter need the money to start fresh in China if we were to break up. I just lol and told them if they feel the marriage won't work then I won't even bother to get marry since in their mind they already have such a negative though and it makes no sense to get marry and then divorce. I simply won't do it. I also mention the recent trends in wedding in China and how girl family actually pays the guy as well. So they were a bit surprise.
I basically stop talking about this whole marriage thing with them and the gf. I can play the waiting game and they can't. Once you reach 28 and still isn't marry as a girl in China the whole society will think something is wrong with you and no one will really want to marry you. Another funny is they actually want to apply for a Visa to come visit Vancouver and see if it is safe here and if their daughter will like it here. I guess they didn't know how hard is it for them to get a Visa. So I kept quiet and let them try only for their application to be deny and the custom laughing their ass off with their application (they have very little savings, doesn't own a property and they are into their 50s). At this point I am just going to take a back seat and enjoy my time spend with my gf.
Last edited by Mr.HappySilp; 07-18-2015 at 02:01 PM.
I know wht you're talking about. What seems to be wrong is the money figure.
For hongers, it's a bit different, they don't get the exact 60k worth back. Hongers give a figure and the mother and father in law "returns 1/2 the favor" back to the groom.
Tradition is groom puts money in envelope and inside there is another envelope. When you give them the 60k, they are suppose to return the favor and give half of it back. True legit and traditional methods.
Guy 1) 500 bucks Canadian which is TOOO low.
2) $2000 cdn
3) $5000 Cdn
no where in HELL have i ever hear of 60k. Nothing against you, but if this is the case. STOP talking about the wedding and let it marinade for a few years. Each time when the issue comes up, tell them you can't fork out the 60k. The girl will realize it's BS, the mom will realize it's BS and as the time ticking clock comes on, the figure will go away.
WHEN that does happen, MAKE sure you tell your gf "hey, by moving forward in planning in a wedding, you know that i am NOT able to give you 60 K right..."
she will reluctantly agree as the bio clock clicks and you have just WON the entire process.
I've done something very similar and it's the ONLY way to go above this.
I thought this dowry bullshit was long gone... looks like it's still around...maybe because its rural china? Is this common in cities like Shanghai, Beijing or Hong Kong?
__________________
Sometimes we tend to be in despair when the person we love leaves us, but the truth is, it's not our loss, but theirs, for they left the only person who couldn't give up on them.
Make the effort and take the risk..
"Do what you feel in your heart to be right- for you'll be criticized anyway. You'll be damned if you do, and damned if you don't." - Eleanor Roosevelt
reads most threads with his pants around his ankles, especially in the Forced Induction forum.
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Vancouver
Posts: 10,645
Thanked 2,191 Times in 1,131 Posts
Failed 929 Times in 340 Posts
Quote:
Originally Posted by tiger_handheld
I thought this dowry bullshit was long gone... looks like it's still around...maybe because its rural china? Is this common in cities like Shanghai, Beijing or Hong Kong?
Is still around in China, Hong Kong and Vancouver. But in most case is more like a symbolic amount. My sister who got marry in Dec my mom didn't receive any money nor ask for any. She knows my sister will be happy and that's more important than any amount money. My sister give my mom $5k as a good gesture. Another friend who got marry here give the girl mom #1314 as a symbolic amount for "forever". I am pretty sure in Canada is somewhat change and in Hong Kong and China you still have to pay a decent amount but no where near what I ask to pay lol.
My though was that since my gf's family came from a rural part of China to them they are still very traditional and because they raise their daughter up they deserve the money (after all raising a child cost a lot of money and effort).
My gf on the other have been studying in a more modern city, seems more and is not that traditional so to her the money is not as important and she also feels the amount her mom ask for ridiculous. However, she also feels she is stuck in the middle which is making things difficult for her. She is moving out pretty out (in a few weeks) and hopefully this will make her feel less stressful.
Funny things is her mom always think that when we were traveling in China in June we rented 2 rooms lol. I would love to see her face when she sees the box of condoms in my gf's suitcase and all those "toys" we play with
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