Quarter-life crisis

[TOS'd]

I can check off most of that list..

[mnash]

Originally Posted by neggo

^ Last time I was asked, automatically I said I was 21. Then I had to correct myself and say I was actually 23...
Now is the best time to break routine and escape mundaneness.

I said "21" a few times too ((( As for comfort zone and breaking routine you are 100% right imo, that's why I'm taking my motorcycle test tomo and going to Forces Recruitment Centre after. Talk about changes haha

[westopher]

I can check off that entire list
However, today I just quit my job, that has absolutely been destroying my mental health. I certainly did not have the money to do it, but by the end of the day I have 3 interviews this weekend and a trial shift tomorrow. That put some fucking jump in my step.

[quasi]

Originally Posted by mnash

I said "21" a few times too ((( As for comfort zone and breaking routine you are 100% right imo, that's why I'm taking my motorcycle test tomo and going to Forces Recruitment Centre after. Talk about changes haha

Riding is great, one of my vices I got back into this year.

[Glove]

fuck why did I read this thread, im so depressed now.

I think all the things on that list get hit with a reset button once you have a kid,

then none of it matters, the only thing that matters is raising your kid properly, and you get to live through your childs happiness.

but we are having kids later and later now, so we get more and more fucked in the head.

thank BC's/Canada's government for that shit

[Hondaracer]

or dont have kids..

[dboy]

Just turned 20, unemployed, not in post secondary. Seeing my friends halfway through college already and thinking to myself if I started right after I graduated I would be halfway done too.

It's been 2 years since I graduated and I still don't know if I want to go to school. Don't know what to take. Time flies.

No idea what I'm doing anymore.

[PJ]

^
There's a Chinese proverb..
"The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now."

If you missed an opportunity, but still planning to make a change "someday".. what better time than now?

[sdubfid]

Originally Posted by PJ

^
There's a Chinese proverb..
"The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now."

If you missed an opportunity, but still planning to make a change "someday".. what better time than now?

I turn 26 in a week and am going back to school in sept after working the past 8 years. Feels like starting from square one again but it will be worth it in the long run.

I've been telling myself I want to travel somewhere for years but just kept working and saving. What will I remember more? Airlockers etc for my 4x4 or a trip to paris, venice, rome, valencia, f1 race, portugal and bermuda?

Just bought a ticket to europe and a ticket for the f1 race in spain.

[bcrdukes]

Originally Posted by sdubfid

I turn 26 in a week and am going back to school in sept after working the past 8 years. Feels like starting from square one again but it will be worth it in the long run.

This will be a refreshing experience. Not only will you go back with a fresh slate, you probably will feel much more wiser and be able to ask more questions requiring deeper thought.

I went back to school just last year after a 2 year haitus. It was a great feeling.

Just bought a ticket to europe and a ticket for the f1 race in spain.

Lucky bastard.

[PJ]

Originally Posted by sdubfid

I turn 26 in a week and am going back to school in sept after working the past 8 years. Feels like starting from square one again but it will be worth it in the long run.

I've been telling myself I want to travel somewhere for years but just kept working and saving. What will I remember more? Airlockers etc for my 4x4 or a trip to paris, venice, rome, valencia, f1 race, portugal and bermuda?

Just bought a ticket to europe and a ticket for the f1 race in spain.

Just, wow. Reading this made me very happy. Good on you, man.

Not many people are able to take that leap and make a change. Whether it's to go back to school, take a fulfilling trip, whatever.

I know I keep stressing this point, but when it comes to these changes, keep asking yourself, if not now, then when? The money will fall into place, there's always options. Loans, selling, downgrading, and so on. What's the worst that can happen? You drive a cheaper car? You have to take the bus? You stop hitting the bars every week?

People make all these excuses as to why they can't make a change that they've been wanting to make. Of all the people I've helped get off their ass, not one of them had a legit excuse.

[dboy]

Originally Posted by sdubfid

I turn 26 in a week and am going back to school in sept after working the past 8 years. Feels like starting from square one again but it will be worth it in the long run.

I've been telling myself I want to travel somewhere for years but just kept working and saving. What will I remember more? Airlockers etc for my 4x4 or a trip to paris, venice, rome, valencia, f1 race, portugal and bermuda?

Just bought a ticket to europe and a ticket for the f1 race in spain.

A wise man once told me in 20 years, you will pat yourself on the back and thank yourself for getting a degree.

[sdubfid]

Originally Posted by PJ

I know I keep stressing this point, but when it comes to these changes, keep asking yourself, if not now, then when?

You hit the nail on the head there.

Originally Posted by dboy

A wise man once told me in 20 years, you will pat yourself on the back and thank yourself for getting a degree.

That's what I've heard. The math shows it too. I calculated time spent in school vs time spent working over 30 years and $5 per hour extra over average journeyman rates would offset the time in school for a degree. A VERY reachable amount.

[AWDTurboLuvr]

I went through that phase when I was in my mid-20s. I was making good money, career was good and I just basically had fun, but didn't do anything really fulfilling. I mean, I got to buy some nice things, had a good car, but none of that meant anything at the end of the day. That lead to some of those feelings the OP listed.

I decided that whatever I wanted to do, but was always afraid or hesitant to try it, just jump in with both feet. I never got a chance to play hockey, so I bought some equipment, joined a team and didn't look back. I've met so many great friends, had fun and even networked with people in the same industry while drinking beers in the locker room. To think if I never said to myself "What the hell, why not?" , I could've still been wondering what it would be like to skate and play hockey. Apply this to any skill or hobby you've wanted to try, you'd be great at so many things in no time.

However, my biggest eye-opening experience was to finally travel. My family didn't travel much when we were kids and I never thought much of it until I realized instead of always wondering what those places were like, why not actually go an experience it? Now, there's the usual thing like enjoying new cultures, meeting new people, etc. However, the most rewarding thing about travelling, is that you get to know yourself much better, especially when you travel alone and pack lightly. I realized, I didn't need too many things to be happy and if you're shy, you get over it pretty quick when you need to ask strangers for help and directions.

The below link will list off a few cool effects of travelling, but the last one is the most important one.

20 Reasons Why Travel Is More Than Just A Vacation | Greenster Inc.

[neggo]

I finally decided to commit and take steps towards leaving my comfort zone, along with a home and a family I've been with my entire life. I sent in an application to Japan to teach English last week and heard back from the company today, with them inviting me to an interview next month. I was happy, but my parents were less than thrilled.

I understand that they are worried about their youngest going to a country that had a devastating natural disaster not so long ago, but I feel as though, at my age, this is an opportune chance to develop as an individual independently. This is something I can't do when I'm older and settled in with a career. If I settle, I'm afraid I'd fall into the void of "what ifs".

My parents are pissed, but what can I do?

[PJ]

Originally Posted by neggo

My parents are pissed, but what can I do?

Talk it over with them. Remember, ultimately, it's your life.

I'm gonna have a chat with my parents soon too. Don't get me wrong, I'll always be thankful for everything my parents have done for me, but there comes a time when you have to go your own way. My parents are going to flip when I quit my engineering job.

Our parents are used to working hard, day after day, just to put food on the table. Again, we're very lucky to have them. That perspective of life is just not how it is here. Not saying it's easy. But there's tons of opportunities here in Canada. What's the point of having all these options available if we're just going to stick to the old ways of life?

A lot of parents don't understand that times have changed. It's pretty hard to get to the "worst case scenario." Now there's back up plans for back up plans for back up plans. Even for people with no back up plans, there's a back up plan somewhere. Unless you're addicted to drugs and have zero drive to make something of yourself, it's pretty hard to hit rock bottom these days.

Sit down with your parents and have a talk about your goals in life, as well as future plans, plan B's, and so on. It's a talk worth having.

[neggo]

Thanks for that. Glad to know I'm not only one facing old fashioned parents.

But it is because they are old fashioned that they do not understand where I am coming from. I explain to them that leaving is something I need to do but all they really reply back with is how dangerous Japan is. Basically, I tell them that going abroad would give me some great experience but all they reply back with is the fact that I'd only get the experience of dying from an earthquake if I were to go there, lol. My older brother and I had a talk with them earlier but they don't want to understand. I think, though, that it will definitely get better in time. They might just need some time to realize that I need to leave. It's not like I'm guaranteed to leave, anyway...there is still an interview.

Hope you find some luck with your parents, too.

[mnash]

Originally Posted by AWDTurboLuvr

However, the most rewarding thing about travelling, is that you get to know yourself much better, especially when you travel alone and pack lightly.

Did that last year. 6000km roadtrip. Van - Vegas - LA - PCH to San Fran - Van. No maps, no GPS, no co-pilots. Nothing. Just me, car, backpack. Sure I got lost in Nevada desert a few times, had a few close calls in LA but it was probably the best thing that ever happened to me. Too bad those fresh impressions didn't last too long , with daily routine here. Planning to do something this summer too, maybe take a train to New York or Miami )

[Teh Doucher]

Originally Posted by mnash

Did that last year. 6000km roadtrip. Van - Vegas - LA - PCH to San Fran - Van. No maps, no GPS, no co-pilots. Nothing. Just me, car, backpack. Sure I got lost in Nevada desert a few times, had a few close calls in LA but it was probably the best thing that ever happened to me. Too bad those fresh impressions didn't last too long , with daily routine here. Planning to do something this summer too, maybe take a train to New York or Miami )

how long did it take you to finish that 6000km road trip?

[CorneringArtist]

"Expectations are resentments waiting to happen".

I've had that line from a song echo every time I try to dig myself out of the jam I'm in. I just turned 20, and I've fallen into the routine described earlier in the thread. Wake up - Work - Dinner - Computer/Video Games - Sleep - Repeat until day off or Sunday. I chose to work straight out of high school as a mechanic. Despite having to go back to school for further apprentice training, that only delays the routine for six weeks. With my schedule, I feel like I've been in the same place on a personal level since I started working; on a material level sure, the money I make let me finance a new car with more than enough to save some, but what's the point if I'm finding life boring? Compound that with the fact I've never been in a relationship ever, or haven't seen any of my friends in almost a year (they're all uni students, but point aside), and it's a damn lonely one too.

In short, I have time for nothing because of my job, and because of my low seniority, I can't make time to do anything, and it's causing me to hit emotional lows constantly when I ask myself questions in my head. I really want to go to Europe or Japan for the cultural experience, but like I said, I have the money for it, but I doubt I can get time off for it.

[PJ]

Make up some excuse as to why you have to be away from work for 2-3 weeks.

I assume you're still living at home.. so your worst case scenario is.. you get fired, you take your trip, you come back and find another job and live at home.. which is what you're already doing.

Excuse me if I'm being presumptuous, but it doesn't seem like you're happy with your routine. If you're not happy now, an extra $5-10 an hour sometime down the road when you're fully licensed isn't going to make you any happier. Trust me. I've been there. As an engineer, I doubled my pay, and still don't feel any more fulfillment at a job I spend 40 hours a week at.

Might be time for you to take that trip and go back to school.

[mnash]

Originally Posted by Teh Doucher

how long did it take you to finish that 6000km road trip?

7 Days flat. Rushed a bit imo, did most of the driving at night with some small breaks. Should dedicate 12 days for a trip like that.

[melloman]

@CorneringArtist: If you want an excuse, that no one would hassle you about, to give u roughly 4 weeks of vacation. Tell your work a close relative has died, and you need time to mourn. If they ask why so much time, say they are in another part of the world, takes time to fly and everything.

[46_valentinor]

i was in the exact same shoe as you guys a year ago, until i met my ex girl friend. i was so madly in love with her that i decided to go to korea 430am in the morning after having an argument with her. 6am rolls along, i went to work and told my manager i need a week off for personal issue immediately and 2 hours later i was at the airport getting my ticket. i arrived in korea, not knowing ANYTHING because it was my first time actually traveling and surprised the crap out of my ex. if i didn't meet her, i would still be living my old boring life, she opened my eyes to all the possibilities outside our little box we call vancouver. was my decision to go korea a stupid one? i think it was totally worth it, i created a priceless memory that i will remember for the rest of my life, met people from around the world and shared our own perspective on life!

don't let work take over you, why work for money when you can't enjoy it. you're still young, you can take the risks, financial impact, if you lose your job. at the end of the day, ITS YOUR LIFE. don't let people control you and ruin you.

[Spartacus]