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Eff-1 03-24-2022 12:00 PM

If you asked me 2 years ago what I thought about kids, I'd echo a lot of people here. There is nothing better than a double income no kids lifestyle.

But eventually something changed. My wife and I both realized something was missing. The idea of sharing our life with someone and raising a child suddenly appealed to us. So now she is 8.5 months pregnant. It's terrifying and exciting all at the same time.

And for what it's worth, all of our good friends have kids too, so our lifestyles align. It's challenging when there is a mismatch.

It wasn't an easy decision. But one I don't regret. Maybe ask me again in 3 months haha.

Financially, it definitely changes things. We can't afford a house but we really love our 2 BR/2 BA condo. But eventually we'll need more space and have to find a place with 1 or 2 more rooms. The market is insane and we don't look forward to when that day comes. However, I think it would be a shame if people who otherwise wanted kids chose not to because of the housing market here. I don't doubt that happens a lot though. This city is fucked up in so many ways.

winson604 03-24-2022 12:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Eff-1 (Post 9058939)
If you asked me 2 years ago what I thought about kids, I'd echo a lot of people here. There is nothing better than a double income no kids lifestyle.

But eventually something changed. My wife and I both realized something was missing. The idea of sharing our life with someone and raising a child suddenly appealed to us. So now she is 8.5 months pregnant. It's terrifying and exciting all at the same time.

And for what it's worth, all of our good friends have kids too, so our lifestyles align. It's challenging when there is a mismatch.

It wasn't an easy decision. But one I don't regret. Maybe ask me again in 3 months haha.

Financially, it definitely changes things. We can't afford a house but we really love our 2 BR/2 BA condo. But eventually we'll need more space and have to find a place with 1 or 2 more rooms. The market is insane and we don't look forward to when that day comes. However, I think it would be a shame if people who otherwise wanted kids chose not to because of the housing market here. I don't doubt that happens a lot though. This city is fucked up in so many ways.

Congrats! You'll love it and things will eventually work out.

quasi 03-24-2022 12:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BlackV62K2 (Post 9058929)
Hanging out with my parent friends takes way more effort and planning vs my friends without kids. Parent friends need like a week in advance for sitters and night usually ends early. Friends with no kids, 1 hour notice and can meetup, Vancouver flakes aside lol.

There are some people like that it really depends on the person I think. I never had any issues even when my son was young, he's older now and doesn't require a sitter but I can't think of anytime a kid handcuffed me from doing anything.

I still made my trips with buddies, I still met my buddies for drinks, it's not really a kid problem your describing it's a relationship problem lol. I have friends that have to check in with what their doing constantly, get approval before they make plans that's never been my life.

Hell I'm on hold right now trying to book Vegas for WSOP for myself, I'll tell my wife about it when she gets home from work and she won't give AF. It's mutual, if my wife makes plans it's all good as well.

68style 03-24-2022 12:52 PM

^ Agree completely, it's a relationship problem not a kid problem, a lot of my friends have crazy overbearing wives and it's sickening to watch, like you see them fearfully start to form words that will become sentences that end with them maybe possibly going out to do something and the wife's lips go thin and eyes filling with rage lol... always be careful of women that don't have their own friends and see their parents as their idols... might seem good when you're dating and early on in the relationship, but then you become the only thing in their life and it's game over.

There are even some who are even worse, like... it's not really their partner, but they're just antisocial and use their partner as their excuse for why they can't go to stuff. Ugh.

Anyway, back to housing!!

Townhouses are as much as houses in many places now. Market sucks unless you're already in. Blah!

EvoFire 03-24-2022 01:00 PM

The separation between the different house classes seemed to have gotten smaller. Or maybe just the numbers are bigger and I'm numb.

freakshow 03-24-2022 01:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Eff-1 (Post 9058939)
It wasn't an easy decision. But one I don't regret. Maybe ask me again in 3 months haha.

You'll definitely want to kill yourself in 3 months.. the first 3, maybe 6 are the absolute worst.. haha
But after that, it'll be the most work and the most fun you've ever had.

whitev70r 03-24-2022 01:36 PM

K, last comment then we can get back to the insane prices of real estate.

I can't help but to think that for some of us ... kids are exactly what we need to make us a better human being. I know we are not suppose to place judgment on values but someone who just cares about themselves and never have to learn to give or bend for another person ends up being a selfish old prick. Now, there are other good reasons not to have children, I'm not saying everyone needs children to make them kind, caring, and patient but if some of the reasons listed here are the only reasons for not having kids ... hell, I can only imagine how fun you are to hang out with.

Eff-1 03-24-2022 02:04 PM

another point about kids. and this ties back into what we were talking about parents a couple pages back.

I am the last one to say that I have a positive relationship with my parents. It's not bad though, could definitely be worse.

But the day I told them we were having a kid brought them so much joy, which in turn brought me so much joy too. It's definitely a moment in my life I'll always remember.

Sure, having a boat or a car or whatever brings joy. But not like that kind of joy.

BlackV62K2 03-24-2022 02:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by quasi (Post 9058947)
There are some people like that it really depends on the person I think. I never had any issues even when my son was young, he's older now and doesn't require a sitter but I can't think of anytime a kid handcuffed me from doing anything.

I still made my trips with buddies, I still met my buddies for drinks, it's not really a kid problem your describing it's a relationship problem lol. I have friends that have to check in with what their doing constantly, get approval before they make plans that's never been my life.

Hell I'm on hold right now trying to book Vegas for WSOP for myself, I'll tell my wife about it when she gets home from work and she won't give AF. It's mutual, if my wife makes plans it's all good as well.

Yeah you're totally right its more on the relationship. I've heard my friends say, let me ask the wife when we plan to hangout lol

bcrdukes 03-24-2022 02:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Eff-1 (Post 9058939)
Financially, it definitely changes things. We can't afford a house but we really love our 2 BR/2 BA condo. But eventually we'll need more space and have to find a place with 1 or 2 more rooms. The market is insane and we don't look forward to when that day comes. However, I think it would be a shame if people who otherwise wanted kids chose not to because of the housing market here. I don't doubt that happens a lot though. This city is fucked up in so many ways.

Come over the the dark side. :hotbaby:

supafamous 03-24-2022 02:23 PM

https://www.rew.ca/properties/R24223...-vancouver-bc#

A measly 1.799m for a 1 bedroom condo downtown (670sf). Put up your side piece here.

whitev70r 03-24-2022 02:40 PM

^ Holy Sh*t on the pricing of that condo. The architecture is quite pronounced and it's at a pretty good location, just at Coal Harbout, entrance to Stanley Park ... but damn!

Traum 03-24-2022 02:52 PM

Whether your 2 br condo is big enough for you and your kid depends on how big your unit is. At the time when I was still living the condo life, we were in a tiny 2 br, 700+ sq ft unit. It was enough when he wasn't mobile on his own, but once he started moving around, we quickly realized the urgency to upsize has intensified.

When we first started looking, we just barely lost out on a 900+ sq ft, 2 br unit in the same apartment complex as we were living in back then. IMO, the layout of that 900+ sq ft unit would have been enough for us until our kid turns 10 or so. Or if we are really disciplined about the amount of junk that we keep around, we can probably stretch it out even further.

Enjoy your freedoms and your sleep now, cuz once the little person comes, you are going to both love and hate your life in that first month with the baby LOL~

Congrats on joining the dark (but sleepless) side!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Eff-1 (Post 9058939)
Financially, it definitely changes things. We can't afford a house but we really love our 2 BR/2 BA condo. But eventually we'll need more space and have to find a place with 1 or 2 more rooms. The market is insane and we don't look forward to when that day comes. However, I think it would be a shame if people who otherwise wanted kids chose not to because of the housing market here. I don't doubt that happens a lot though. This city is fucked up in so many ways.


Alpine 03-24-2022 02:59 PM

https://www.reddit.com/r/canucks/com..._why_they_had/

lol Go Vancouver go!.

hotjoint 03-24-2022 07:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Eff-1 (Post 9058970)
another point about kids. and this ties back into what we were talking about parents a couple pages back.

I am the last one to say that I have a positive relationship with my parents. It's not bad though, could definitely be worse.

But the day I told them we were having a kid brought them so much joy, which in turn brought me so much joy too. It's definitely a moment in my life I'll always remember.

Sure, having a boat or a car or whatever brings joy. But not like that kind of joy.

My relationship with my parents has actually been stronger since I've had a kid. I see all the hard work and dedication that was needed to raise my brother and I so I appreciate them so much more. They tell me stories about when I was his age all the time. It's brought us closer now so I'm grateful for that. I never had a problem with my parents growing up but it was the typical asian parents that worked and provided and left you alone for the most part to do your own thing type of relationship

sdubfid 03-24-2022 11:11 PM

I have seen multiple rumours on the possibility of down payments for investment properties being raised to 35% and no borrowed funds eg heloc able to be used for down payment.

If this were to happen how can the funding source be traced? Could someone transfer heloc to bank account for 6 months prior to purchase?

GGnoRE 03-25-2022 07:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sdubfid (Post 9059034)
I have seen multiple rumours on the possibility of down payments for investment properties being raised to 35% and no borrowed funds eg heloc able to be used for down payment.

I don't even think that will be necessary because the RE market will probably cool off by itself.
  1. Financial markets are pricing in 2 rate hikes in April, 3 additional rate hikes by July, and a total of 8-10 rate hikes by end of this year (total increase of ~2% in interest rate from where we are today). For the first time, we will see buyers be subject to the higher stress test rate of prime+2% as opposed to the standard 5.25% at least for fixed rate mortgages.
  2. The weakness that we are seeing in the equity markets will have a negative wealth effect impact on the speculative segment of the RE market which accounted for 25~30% of purchases in GVA & GTA in 2021.
  3. High inflation pushing higher cost of living will dissuade locals from buying or upgrading their property. Not many would be looking to increase their mortgage when their food bills, energy bills, gas bills etc. are going up.

I'm not predicting a catastrophic crash, nor would I want one as a homeowner, but I do think that the market will cool off as there are several headwinds in the near future. This isn't the same as before when bears were projecting a decline based on some loose fundamentals like average home price to income ratio or the amount of household debt.

JDMDreams 03-25-2022 08:45 AM

How will they know, move money from heloc to mom's chequing account, bam now money are assets :ahwow: then gift to xyz. Or move money from heloc to chequing sit for 90 days, then it's savings :ahwow:


Quote:

Originally Posted by sdubfid (Post 9059034)
I have seen multiple rumours on the possibility of down payments for investment properties being raised to 35% and no borrowed funds eg heloc able to be used for down payment.

If this were to happen how can the funding source be traced? Could someone transfer heloc to bank account for 6 months prior to purchase?


Gerbs 03-25-2022 09:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Eff-1 (Post 9058939)
It wasn't an easy decision. But one I don't regret. Maybe ask me again in 3 months haha.

Financially, it definitely changes things. We can't afford a house but we really love our 2 BR/2 BA condo. But eventually we'll need more space and have to find a place with 1 or 2 more rooms. The market is insane and we don't look forward to when that day comes. However, I think it would be a shame if people who otherwise wanted kids chose not to because of the housing market here. I don't doubt that happens a lot though. This city is fucked up in so many ways.

Just curious, do people usually budget for kids and if so, how much do people budget? Aside from daycare, how much do people expect to spend per month on their kids?

I just hopped back into the no kids/DINK mindset after realizing that kids might not be affordable in Vancouver due to housing and rising costs. The financial sacrifice to upgrade from a 1/2BR > a 3BR+ home isn't worth it at the moment. Especially since most people in their mid 20's atm didn't have the luxury to hop on the equity train in 2015 - 2017.

Great68 03-25-2022 09:39 AM

With a newborn, the biggest single expense for us was the wife's loss of income due to mat leave. $30k+ right off the bat.

Outside of that, you'll have some one time equipment purchases (stroller, high chair, toys things of that nature) which if you're savvy you can buy a lot of in great shape second hand, and can sell when you're done with them for nearly the same amount you paid (as we did with most of our stuff).

Obviously your grocery bill will go up for diapers or formula (Although our kid never took to a bottle, he was 100% boob fed so we never had that expense).

Once they're in they're later toddler years and can eat normal solid food, then there's nothing too big in terms of monthly costs outside of daycare. Just clothes as they outgrow them (again, second hand market is huge here), nothing that I really make a "special budget" for.

Actually that's not true, I opened an RESP and contribute regularly to that. Also stick any money family and friends gift him for things like birthdays and such. 4 years old and he's already got a net worth of $10k.

6thGear. 03-25-2022 09:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sdubfid (Post 9059034)
I have seen multiple rumours on the possibility of down payments for investment properties being raised to 35% and no borrowed funds eg heloc able to be used for down payment.

If this were to happen how can the funding source be traced? Could someone transfer heloc to bank account for 6 months prior to purchase?

If source of funds is untraceable it'll trigger FINTRAC and Anti-money laundering act (aka) Proceeds of Crime and Terrorist Financing Act (PCMLTFA)
Even if banks change policies on down payment for investment properties, they will find a way to get around it and still allow borrowed funds.

quasi 03-25-2022 09:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gerbs (Post 9059053)
Just curious, do people usually budget for kids and if so, how much do people budget? Aside from daycare, how much do people expect to spend per month on their kids?

I just hopped back into the no kids/DINK mindset after realizing that kids might not be affordable in Vancouver due to housing and rising costs. The financial sacrifice to upgrade from a 1/2BR > a 3BR+ home isn't worth it at the moment. Especially since most people in their mid 20's atm didn't have the luxury to hop on the equity train in 2015 - 2017.

I don't specifically budget for my son, he's 15. The most expensive thing that I remember out of pocket was child care for his first 10 years.

He goes through shoes at a stupid rate, his sports are expensive weekly private boxing lessons, football, rugby all cost a lot of money. Even things like cleats add up, buy 1-2 pairs of those a year and of course he only wants the expensive ones.

He's almost 6' tall and eats more than I do, two dinners one when he gets home from school and one around 7:00.

Although I'm scared to add it up I will say that most of the disposable income I use throughout the year is on my son, I spend very little on myself. In short, kids are fucking expensive lol.

Edit: You know what can cost as much as kids? Dogs! Lol, I spent around 4K in vet bills on one of my dogs and probably around 2K on the other one so there you go somethings are just as bad or worse. :)

Traum 03-25-2022 11:44 AM

IMO, outside of the lost income during pregnancy, the cost of daycare, and the cost of additional living space that is needed for the kids, other aspects of children expense isn't all that different from how we control our own spendings. At least, I would expect this to be true up until puberty hits.

You can have fun ripping around in a pos Civic, or you can have fun in the latest greatest BMW Supra. A big part of it really depends on how much you are setting yourself up to spend.

Another thing is, with a kid in your life, the amount of time you have to spend on other stuff dramatically drops. So you have less time and fewer places on where you can spend the money on yourself. Back when I was still single, I was out racing at least twice a month, with the corresponding spendings to support that addition LOL~ But now? I'd be lucky if I can sneak out to do that once a month...

6thGear. 03-25-2022 01:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by quasi (Post 9059059)
I don't specifically budget for my son, he's 15. The most expensive thing that I remember out of pocket was child care for his first 10 years.

He goes through shoes at a stupid rate, his sports are expensive weekly private boxing lessons, football, rugby all cost a lot of money. Even things like cleats add up, buy 1-2 pairs of those a year and of course he only wants the expensive ones.

He's almost 6' tall and eats more than I do, two dinners one when he gets home from school and one around 7:00.

Although I'm scared to add it up I will say that most of the disposable income I use throughout the year is on my son, I spend very little on myself. In short, kids are fucking expensive lol.

Edit: You know what can cost as much as kids? Dogs! Lol, I spent around 4K in vet bills on one of my dogs and probably around 2K on the other one so there you go somethings are just as bad or worse. :)

Can vouch for expensive vet bills. My dogs 5 teeth extraction and cleaning was $3k

quasi 03-25-2022 01:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 6thGear. (Post 9059093)
Can vouch for expensive vet bills. My dogs 5 teeth extraction and cleaning was $3k

Yeah it's pretty brutal. My dog had a fist size hole in his leg for the entire summer last year, muscle totally exposed it was so nasty. He'd go outside and start rubbing dirt in it, I was at the vet 2-3 times a week for June through Sept.


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