Income Disparity Amoung Your Friends?

[pastarocket]

If friends of friends are involved in more meaningful events such as bachelor parties, I think that spending more money that what a guy budgets for a night out is expected.

A friend got married in September. He tells me and other friends that his bachelor party would be low key. Just a fancy dinner at Chinese restaurant.

He did not want one of his groomsmen to take him and the circle of friends to a strip club. That might have been a more expensive night out for all the guys haha.

Anyways, the bachelor party dinner menu was pre ordered by one of my friend's closest friends. All the fancy items like abalone, Alaskan crab, Beijing duck, etc. The bill per person was about $252.00 before tip for a table of ten.

Some of the guys at that dinner had a pale look on their faces when they saw their bill.

That friend said that his closest friends thought about renting a Lambo for him to drive on the Sea to Sky highway as part of his bachelor party.

That idea got shot down fast when that group of friends found out that each person would pay about $400 to $500 each for a group of ten people. -not sure which rental company they were contacting about renting a Huracan.

Although I have a Huracan as my avatar, I would have said No to pitching in money for a Lambo rental for my buddy if I was part of that group of friends who thought about an exotic car experience for the groom.

[bcrdukes]

Next Stock & Noob Meat @ LA Chicken?

[mikemhg]

Originally Posted by bcrdukes

Next Stock & Noob Meat @ LA Chicken?

That damn place only sits about 8 people on a good day

[bcrdukes]

We hang out in the parking lot and Badhobz will be the cock block while 68style works his magic on Fried Chicken lady.

[EvoFire]

Originally Posted by mikemhg

That damn place only sits about 8 people on a good day

That parking lot also only fits like 8 cars on a good day

[JDMDreams]

There's food and milk tea at lucky joy if you get hungry and can't wait

[freakshow]

Originally Posted by supafamous

Fun Fact: The couple that ran LA Chicken divorced about 4-5 years ago and the lady no longer works there. It's just the guy plus some old Chinese guy who does all the cooking now.

I thought i saw the lady there a few weeks ago...

[Gerbs]

Originally Posted by PeanutButter

And now that I think of it, I look at my group and you can really see the income disparity, We're all highschool friends, so the demographic of the group is pretty diverse.

I'm not really sure what's to be done about this, but just curious if you guys are in a similar boat with your friends?

My highschool friends, ranged from unemployed, $40K - 130K from 22-27. Now at 28, the curve got flattened $85 - 150k once everyone has 5-8 YOE and job hopped 1-3x. This doesn't include family inheritance income, investments, side incomes or rental properties etc. Strictly employment + self employment.


As I hung out with people with more expensive hobbies such as drop-in sports, concerts and events, golf, winter sports, partying, cars, etc. There's definitely a bias where everyone earns over $100-300k+. Those who can't afford it or don't want to spend the money seem to weed themselves out overtime. I think as you get older, people will gravitate towards groups that can also afford that lifestyle so they don't have to deal with IOU's, always picking the cheapest option. hearing "that's so expensive or not worth it". It would be hard to extend an invite to those you know who wouldn't be done after they continuously decline.

Best play imo if you can afford to, is to offer to pay for friends who can't afford it!

[supafamous]

Originally Posted by freakshow

I thought i saw the lady there a few weeks ago...

I haven't seen her in years - was the ex there too? I only ever go on Saturdays so it's possible she works days when he isn't around (and I'm not). I know the divorce definitely happened - source is a family member of theirs.

[Qmx323]

I used to go all the time when I worked at Automall, sad to hear

They ran the place pretty well and smoothly.

Always hooked me up with 4 pieces when I only order 2. Got so fat lol.

[winson604]

Even though I frequent Richmond enough I always tend to hit some Chinese spot instead. I had always thought LA Chicken was #2 or #3 on my list (Churches #1) but then I finally had it again recently after like 3 or 4 years and it wasn't that great. Unpopular opinion I know!

[PeanutButter]

Originally Posted by JqC

There's a family that reached out out to us to hangout a few times over the last year cause our kids got along in school.
Went to their kids birthday parties and a couple playdates at their place. Chatting with them they were always pretty frank about how bad inflation is and how hard it is to keep up, which we can all relate to.

After a couple hangouts at their place, we decided to reciprocate with a playdate at our place. The mom was a bit 'off' that day, and the family abruptly left early cause she wasn't feeling well. We didn't think much of it at the time.

Now it's been a few months and we haven't heard from them at all. They also were not able to make it to any of our invites either.
We find out through mutual friends (who are much closer to them than we are) that they are actually really stressed financially, and we wonder if that has something to do with us not being to hang out lately.
While we're not rich by any means, they may have felt uncomfortable realizing we're doing a bit more 'okay' than they are. Sucks if this is true, as it may help prevent us from getting together with them more often.

Oh dude, my wife was at Strong Start with our kid, it's like a place to go meet other families and help develop and foster skills for children. Pretty much a free program from the VSB.

My wife told me that this mom made a comment how our son always had berries for his snack. Raspberries, blackberries, etc. And she said how they're so expensive now. My wife definitely agreed, but our son likes them, so we just get them.

Anyway, my wife got to know her pretty well and that mom's family was struggling pretty badly and their groceries were always dictated by what was on sale and if berries were too expensive, they wouldn't buy them.

Thinking about it now, this interaction might have been the first time I really realized there are different economic levels between people. I guess I never paid much attention to it before. So I guess when I found out about my friends who aren't at the same level, it's been affecting me more and more, hence this post.

I do like the idea of having the friends over and just hosting everything myself, so just spend $100 on dinner and having people over, that might be a nice way of connecting without having to go out and spend money at a restaurant.

[Badhobz]

its funny we have these thoughts now. Where the fuck was this charity when we were growing up?

i dont ever recall my parents asking to borrow money or even having friends over. In fact im pretty sure they had zero friends while i was growing up and thus they turned into a bunch of weirdo ass hermits. Pretty damn sad.

Its good to see you guys being so open. my parents and my childhood would have turned out very different if they had this kind of emotional support.

Originally Posted by PeanutButter

I do like the idea of having the friends over and just hosting everything myself, so just spend $100 on dinner and having people over, that might be a nice way of connecting without having to go out and spend money at a restaurant.

your wife might say otherwise. especially if it turns into a long term thing.

My buddy and his wife used to come over to play big2 all the time. I got tired of cleaning up the toilet and dishes every week so now we just go out. To be honest the pandemic killed it first, but we didnt reinstate this house meetup afterwards.

[CivicBlues]

Seriously I don't have people over because the thought of my friends' drunken piss back-splashing all over my bathroom floor has me shuddering.

Do that shit (and piss) at a restaurant.

[Hondaracer]

My parents had big annual parties all the time and always had friends over in the summer as well. My wife’s family was the same huge gatherings of all the siblings and as a result her and all her cousins (6 that still live In the lower mainland) all still hang out all the time which is great, and now those cousins kids are all friends with each other as well, which feels like a rarity with white people lol.

We’ve kinda carried on the tradition my parents set and have a big Xmas party as well as a more informal summer bbq where we cover most of the food and some beers etc.

A couple hundred bucks goes a long way to feed people, can’t afford to go to Les Amis anymore but Costco does the trick

[GLOW]

Originally Posted by Badhobz

My buddy and his wife used to come over to play big2 all the time. I got tired of cleaning up the toilet and dishes every week so now we just go out. To be honest the pandemic killed it first, but we didnt reinstate this house meetup afterwards.

similar story, used to host/have friends over all the time before pandemic. our dishwasher was only a dish rack so it was a lot of dishes to wash

transitioned to just using paper plates, but ya, we stopped hosting gatherings and really became hermits.

if anything we host play dates for our kids so they get to socialize.

@honda damn that's a nice spread, looks nicer than some work events i go to

[Hondaracer]

Paper plates, napkins, disposable cuttlery, and a garbage can with contractor bags.

Only wash serving dishes and wine glasses then. This year was probably the most dialed in we’ve had it. Was lit AF by 1am or so and still managed to clean up 90% of it lol

Costco has crazy deals on paper plates, cuttlery, napkins, etc. everything you need so if you host once or twice a year stock up and you’ll be good for a few for $60-$70

[Badhobz]

the dishes dont bother me as much as the toilet duties afterward.

I should just force all these motherfuckers to sit their ass down. I dont care if your dick is in the bowl, deal with it. I aint cleaning up your splatters

AND DONT JERK OFF TO MY BIDET !

[donk.]

Originally Posted by Qmx323

Always hooked me up with 4 pieces when I only order 2. Got so fat lol.

Time to update your avatar, Bill.

[GLOW]

Originally Posted by Hondaracer

Costco has crazy deals on paper plates, cuttlery, napkins, etc. everything you need so if you host once or twice a year stock up and you’ll be good for a few for $60-$70

the best is the wooden/biodegradable cutlery, felt bad tossing plastics

Originally Posted by Badhobz

the dishes dont bother me as much as the toilet duties afterward.

I should just force all these motherfuckers to sit their ass down. I dont care if your dick is in the bowl, deal with it. I aint cleaning up your splatters

AND DONT JERK OFF TO MY BIDET !

maybe you need to drop a cherio in your toilet or a bee sticker so they have a target to aim

Originally Posted by donk.

Time to update your avatar, Bill.

Spoiler!

shit this is how i feel with my post pandemic bod

[EvoFire]

Originally Posted by PeanutButter

Oh dude, my wife was at Strong Start with our kid, it's like a place to go meet other families and help develop and foster skills for children. Pretty much a free program from the VSB.

My wife told me that this mom made a comment how our son always had berries for his snack. Raspberries, blackberries, etc. And she said how they're so expensive now. My wife definitely agreed, but our son likes them, so we just get them.

Anyway, my wife got to know her pretty well and that mom's family was struggling pretty badly and their groceries were always dictated by what was on sale and if berries were too expensive, they wouldn't buy them.

Thinking about it now, this interaction might have been the first time I really realized there are different economic levels between people. I guess I never paid much attention to it before. So I guess when I found out about my friends who aren't at the same level, it's been affecting me more and more, hence this post.

I do like the idea of having the friends over and just hosting everything myself, so just spend $100 on dinner and having people over, that might be a nice way of connecting without having to go out and spend money at a restaurant.

That's one of the things that I tell my wife we are very privileged with. We are tight with the mortgage but we still try to eat well and healthy. When we do groceries we just buy whatever she or the kids like. Many people don't have that luxury and has to eat whatever that's on sale or generates the most food for the least amount of money. She just picked up some affinois because she wanted some, I picked up a few mangoes because it looked ripe and my daughter would like it. Avocados and dragonfruit is a stable food every week for the kids. I passed on some $11.99 strawberries because that's a retarded price but still can afford some $5.99 raspberries to make up that berry need.

I guess we are fortunate we don't have to mind our friends as much as everyone is making decent money. There's like really one or two guys who are really bad with life choices, but it's very rare.

[Badhobz]

I dont know if you guys did this, but i found that I've weeded out a lot of my friends.

Im down to a very small core group of people i enjoy and a lot of the old buddies that i used to hang with slowly drifted apart. Most of the guys that drifted are still stuck in the "20's mode" and enjoy annoying shit like clubbing / staying out past 9pm / and recreational drug use.

Nothing against these things, i just think im too close to 40 to do these things anymore.

My night of fun includes going to bed at 9pm, looking at random scenery, yelling at clouds, and the occasional ooggling of younger women who have a net negative interest in reciprocating anything other than a middle finger.

Fuck i dont even drive very fast anymore. Like i was going 80 the other day and was like WOAH this is kinda dangerous.

Everyday i look in the mirror i dont like what i see. Then google photos hits me with HEY 12 years ago you were pretty FLY and wasnt such a fat stupid fuck.
FUCK YOU GOOGLE you piece of shit.

its 9:05, im going to bed.

[hypediss]

Originally Posted by winson604

Even though I frequent Richmond enough I always tend to hit some Chinese spot instead. I had always thought LA Chicken was #2 or #3 on my list (Churches #1) but then I finally had it again recently after like 3 or 4 years and it wasn't that great. Unpopular opinion I know!

ever since they broke their broaster the place has been shit, youre not wrong the place went downhill the past couple of years.

[EvoFire]

I still go back to LA chicken every now and then, just haven't been as often as before covid

[underscore]

Originally Posted by GLOW

similar story, used to host/have friends over all the time before pandemic. our dishwasher was only a dish rack so it was a lot of dishes to wash

transitioned to just using paper plates, but ya, we stopped hosting gatherings and really became hermits.

Same here, we were the first ones to get a place so we kinda ended up hosting by default. Which was fine but it's a lot of work even for fairly minor stuff. Then we were the first to have kids (actually the only ones so far now that I think about it) but nobody else was willing to host anything so it all kinda died. Apart from a couple of them I basically never see or hear anything from most of those guys anymore.

Our other friends that have kids around the same age we see more often now (relatively speaking). As the kids grow up it gets easier and we see each other more frequently which is nice.