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Kyle,
2nd photo the flash is pointing too far down her torso. The light fall off is causing the brightness of her shirt to overcome the exposure of her face.
As well, when placing your subject on a third, MOST of the time you want the deadspace to follow their faced direction. In this case, I would say that this would hold true as well. Your composition would be stronger if you placed her on the left third instead of the right third.
Good work! Keep practicing.
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