[Girl]

Dear Husband,

I know it's been 3 'lovely' years since we've been together. But the truth is. I have been cheating on you. The nights I am doing OT, really means me bent over getting it doggy style in those $600 Manolos you got me last week. When I say I am going on a "business trip" it really means that I've signed up for a week long orgy party in Vegas or I'm tied up to the bed post of my current lover and getting teased, tortured, and madly pleasured.

On those nights that I am too "tired" to sleep with you really just means my herpes are inflammed and I would feel sort of bad for giving them to you...and I wouldn't want you finding out that I've been riding dirty with other men (this includes your step son Matt).

I'm just so sick and tired of you not giving me enough attention! When I say I want to watch a movie, it doesn't mean watching peoples heads' get blown off, it means I want to engage in a sappy chick flick, like the Notebook where I can recreate the fantasies that you can't fulfill. When I say "I don't care" it means I want you to ask me, and probe further. When I am mad, I wish you can take me like woman that I am suppose to be and make me feel like a dirty little whore instead of making false promises then pop another Viagra pill.

If you weren't rich and being in the public eye so much, I would have killed you off a long time ago, besides waiting for you to die of old age so I can inherit all the money.

Well got to go, love you sweet pea.


Much Love XoXoXo,

Girl