[underscore]

holy fuck so the whole time we've been on this 4 day trip with our friends you've barely spoken to me, hell we've barely spoken in the last few weeks. when we went to bed Monday night you slept on the couch and I slept alone, I kept waking up every hour and looking over to see if you'd come in and crawled into bed with me but nope. Finally yesterday when I got back from skiing I asked you what was up and you told me that you realised 2 weeks ago that it wasn't anything I had done but you wanted to be single but hadn't figured out how to tell me that. Oddly enough that lines up with a few days after we first slept together, fucking great. Now even though I know it isn't true I still have a little feeling inside of me like you just used me to lose your virginity and that's it. Good thing I spoke to you before I went into town to grab more food because I was planning on buying you flowers and telling you that I love you when I came back and gave them to you.

I love you, and I'm really gonna miss being with you. Hopefully we can still be friends when this stops hurting so much and I stop forgetting every so often that we aren't still together and wanting to go give you a hug.