Quote:
Originally Posted by BallPeenHammer
Nothing to do with ungrateful.
which is the other most abused term in a family.
I came from one which abused both, so I am more inclined to not side with the parents.
Ecchiecchi, READ BETWEEN THE LINES - they dropped 20K to renovate the place. I don't believe anyone wouldn't let someone do it when they don't have to pay for it. <----EDIT: Oh really?? I must've missed that =p my bad. I thought that was one of the conditions that they'd be allowed to stay there!
When I see this kind of behaviour from parents, I can't condone it regardless. If they always think they know better, then they should behave better. Not like children. I was kinda being sarcastic about the suing thing, but really, what the parents are doing isn't helping either. =p
I should have cleared up: If the parents have an issue with them living there, this is NOT the way to try to kick them out. This is already burning the bridge as it is. If this is a sheer issue where the parents are being jerks (and I've seen it), then they'll need the proverbial wake up call. That's what I had to do (not sue) to wake up my parents and grandparents, that they can't just step all over me just because I lived at home. Mind you I was only there 'til I was 19, but before that, the way that they treated me was at time HORRIBLE. Maybe it'd fly in Asia, but for a CBC like me, it will never EVER fly, NOR would it ever be justified. Everything can be worked out. Being a flat out jerk to try to "hint" at something has never really worked.
As for the father wandering in and sitting down....that's kinda creepy, especially if my wife were to be preggers.......lack of privacy, u know?
One thing I do agree is that the husband needs to talk to the parents and see wtf is going on. Whether they're hinting at something, or they're just being mean, or they need to start paying rent, etc etc.
With the way this is going, it's just gonna blow up in everyone's face in the end.
|
Problem is- we don't even have an idea on what the in-laws think about all of this. All i gather from this is that the wife is being a whiney little bitch about the whole issue. From all the posts made by SumAznGuy, I do not see anything about the in-laws saying anything. If anything, it seems like there has been no effort in communicating with the parents.
And I don't see how the in-laws are stepping on this couple in any way or manner. I see 4 issues in this situation here.
1) The $1000 that was held onto by the inlaws that the couple never recieved.
2) The husband's dad comes down to the basement to watch TV
3) The husband's mom takes the wife's clothes out of the dryer and into the hamper.
4) The husband's parents do not want to babysit the couple's kids
Let's break it down on how to analyze the problem here.
1) The $1000 that was held onto by the inlaws that the couple never recieved.
The first question we have to ask is- have they talked to the husband's parents about it? Did they attempt to find out why the money wasn't given to them? All I can gather is that the money never got to them and the wife is bitching about it.
What effort did she put to get the money back?
2) The husband's dad comes down to the basement to watch TV
Sure it's creepy- but again, has the wife or, better yet, the husband attempted to talk to his dad about this issue? Have they communicated that the wife does not feel comfortable with the situation at hand?
What have they done to resolve this matter? Bitch about how they spent $20k on renovating the house. Just because they decided to drop $20k to improve the place they live in DOES NOT mean that the basement is their property. If i spent $20k renovating my room and I tell my dad that it's my property now, He'd probably kick me in the face, give me $20k back and kick me out of the house. Why? Because that's just dumb. "Sitting on my couch" and "watching on my tv" is such a childish argument since technically speaking- they're living at "the in-law's house" and they are utilizing "in-law's electricity." If anything, this seems to be more an issue of lack of personal space. If so, it's to be expected when you're bumming of your parents house.
If they want personal space- move out. Else, be fucking grateful that you can bum at your parents home and save money.
3) The husband's mom takes the wife's clothes out of the dryer and into the hamper.
I understand and accept that people have their own personality and even though I personality think it's stupid- I would understand why she'd be ticked about this. Now the question is, does the husband's mom know that the wife feels uncomfortable that the husband's mom puts her laundry into the "dirty" hamper after it dries?
What I want to know is a) How many washing machine and dryers do they have in this household? and b) Have they communicated the fact that the wife doesn't like to have her clean clothing put into the "dirty" hamper after drying?
4) The husband's parents do not want to babysit the couple's kids
Like I said in my earlier posts, it's the in-laws right to choose if they want to babysit the kids or not.
Go ask the wife's parents or go hire a baby sitter. The wife has bitches about the husband's parents and suddenly they want them to take care of their kids? If people here think this is how it should be, then I've lost hope in society. Your parents don't owe you jackshit after they've done their job in raising you properly- to my understanding, that's how western culture works.
Now- after reading and re-reading, I see no signs of the husband's parents wanting the young couple to move out of the household. All I see is the wife jumping to conclusions, bitching and not doing anything to help the situation.
Bitching doesn't solve anything- If it makes her feel better, good for her- but it still doesn't solve jack shit. If things get solved just by bitching about it, we would probably have world peace by now.
Oh, let's not forget- The fact that the husband's parents allowed the couple to stay and live with them has allowed the husband to purchase 2 condos that, more or less, pay for themselves. Seeing how this will benefit the couple more than anyone in the long-run, I don't see how they shouldn't be grateful to the husband's parents.
If the couple can't even resolve simple problems like these then I don't think they're ready to have kids.