[babykiller]

My buddy is a private investigator, and so many people are all "Oh cool, you're awesome!" when he tells them that he started lying about it like

"Oh what do you do?"

"Garbage man."

"Oh... neat?"

"Yeah it's cool, you find all kinds of stuff in the garbage, like bras, and and shit you can fix, and shit like that. It's a little gross the morning after prom night, but other than that, totally rad."