[Excelsis]

Originally Posted by Jmac

Me pissed off at GF for nearly dislodging the bumper on one of our cars when parking
GF: "I don't know why you're so upset, it wasn't my fault."
Me: "Were you driving?"
GF: "Yes"
Me: "Do the brakes work?"
GF: "Yes"
Me: "Does the hand brake work?"
GF: "Uh huh"
Me: "Did someone rear-end you as you were entering the spot?"
GF: "Obviously not"
Me: "So how isn't this your fault?"
GF: "I forgot to put my contacts in."