Quote:
Originally Posted by El Bastardo
The following is an anonymous post. If the original poster would like to reply to any comments, please PM me
I'm interested in a girl and I don't want to be friend zoned...
My situation is I met a girl and we've been talking for a little bit now.. she seems to be opening up to me a bit more everyday but I have a problem.. I found out she recently broke up with her bf (complicated problems they tried to fix but couldn't.. so he ended it)
I need some advice on how to handle this situation..
1) I already know I shouldn't bring up ex's but when she says shes sad or blah blah.. should I ask what happened or try change the subject?
2) When should I make a move on her... Its literally been weeks since they broke up.. I don't feel comfortable/think its a good idea to try now but I don't want to wait to long
3) Any open thoughts on the situation would be nice.. all advice and comments will be appreciated
Thanks.
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my advice is, don't be upfront like all the other guys here said. reason being...
1) it's only been weeks since they broke up and you're trying to start another relationship with her.
2) she needs space and time to get over him
3) she's at a time where she doesn't know if she still likes him or not
4) being upfront is a hit and miss honestly, you'll either get her to like you or you'll scare her away forever
what she really needs now is a friend who will listen. if you really like her and care about her, just be there for her whenever she feels sad. don't ask her about her ex. only listen when she wants to tell you. when she's upset, cheer her up with something spontaneous.
but seeing your #2 question, it doesn't seem like you guys have a very close relationship as friends and you just want to get straight to the point. just think about it, she's all upset about her previous relationship and now you're here confessing your feelings to her and asking her to give you an answer immediately.
lay off the pressure on her for now and just keep in contact. message everyday in the morning and when you go to sleep. do this for several weeks and slide in several days or a week of not messaging and see if she message you, or how she responds. test her feelings for you by seeing if she misses you when you're not there and when you're absolutely sure, then tell her you like her. you're not friendzoned until the girl clearly states in the form "just want to be friends", "i see us as friends", etc.
EDIT - after reading Hash_Berlin's post, he has nailed it. But first ask yourself what your intention is with her, relationship or get laid?
Girls like to think, as a matter of fact, like to over think, and she'll come looking for you when she sees you having fun with your life.