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Maybe a redundant question, but if you had to replace corner lights, the assumption is the point of contact was relatively low.
Old CRV's have very high taillights, and unless you hit her spare tire rack, there's no way the taillight would have cracked.
Of course, if you HAD hit the spare tire assembly, damage would have been far more extensive.
I think the reason you're getting flak on here is because your entire argument is based on what YOU think her damage is/was. So you think you're getting screwed.
It's good that you filed a complaint, now you should ask for evidence to why it cost $3000 (invoice, etc), and try to prove to them that that is unreasonable and that there may be a conflict of interest involved.
Assuming you did all this already, I'm not entirely sure what more you want RS to answer...=/
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