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Originally Posted by dinosaur
wtf? are you srs?! Its not cheating if he tells her right away??
"Hey Honey! How was work?"
"Work was great! Fucked the secretary at lunch but its cool cause I'm telling you within 5 hours!"
Are you also going to suggest its not cheating if it is a different timezone? different city? country?
IMO, cheating is when some partakes in an intimate encounter (sex, kissing, groping, oral sex, handjobs, sexting, etc...and even emotionally cheating) with someone else when you are in a committed monogamous relationship.
Your logic is fucked. |
I'll repeat again.
What is cheating? Cheating is when you lie about loving someone else while you're with someone. Cheating is when you go behind your SO's back and have sex/make love to another person.
I think you already presume that OP and his GF lives together, that OP and this chick fucked, and that OP loves this chick he just met.
I think that in a relationship before any commitment is made, there is still open space to meet that right person, if/when that right person comes along. And as long as he is responsible about it afterwards, then it's okay. If he continues to love his girlfriend, and sees this other chick, then that would be cheating.
It's feelings I'm talking about here, something you can't control. He was on a vacation, and if he comes home but still doesn't tell her, then it's cheating her feelings. If this was happening locally, it would instantly be cheating.
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in my opinion, telling her is selfish because you are not willing to live with the guilt and instead you are passing the pain over to her in order to make you feel better. you're just passing the bomb to her.
if you love her and truly care about her then don't ever tell her, even though if you are planning on staying with her or if you are planning to break up with her.
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It's a two sided debate. Some people rather know the truth and move on.
It's different for every relationship and how well you know your gf and if she's strong enough to handle it. Also, other stuff like your family and her family, commitment, etc. matters if you should tell her or not.
Considering OP's relationship is only 1 year, I assume it's not very deep, so telling her would be the right choice.