[El Bastardo]

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It's unfortunate I had to find this out from one of her friends who couldn't keep it from me.

Anyways, there's a guy I knew from highschool. We haven't talked since, but he talks to my girlfriend sometimes. Nick and my girlfriend Jess have had a past, sort of. Jess wanted to go out with Nick a few years ago before we started dating but was rejected. She told me she didn't know why she liked him and said he's a bad/dumb guy anyway. He went away to work and invited her to stay for a day before (he has a girlfriend). Recently he came back and they've been talking more.

Now, our 3 year anniversary was recent, and apparently this happened within a day or two. They went somewhere until 2:30 am and I had no idea she went somewhere. Her friend didn't show me that part, just showed me that he started putting his hand around her and they began kissing passionately and it led to sex in the car. She said she didn't feel guilty at the time and didn't even think of me. To make things worse, she said it was the most passionate kiss she's had and probably the best sex. Ouch.

If you know Jess you'd never expect this. She's neglected all of her friends to spend time with me, spending hours a day to see me. She's the type that loves romance, always talks about marriage and spending the rest of her life with her love, always crying, overly emotional, etc. Innocent.

However, she hasn't told me anything because she doesn't want to hurt me. But now I know she's been hiding something. A few days ago, something that I did know about eventually, he took her to a work event thing, and she told me the next day. I accused her of wanting to see him because he came over the next day with another guy to try to recruit her for Amway. Her friend told me she tried to kiss him but he didn't care (duh, he's a cheater). We talked today after I found out about the sex and I pretended I didn't know. She said from now on she'll tell me everything - which tells me she's been hiding something. I know she's feeling guilty now.

While I'll admit things have been out of touch (busy working on something), I'm not sure if I can forgive what she did in the car. I also feel extra humiliated because I know the guy and they're both in a relationship. That's just way too far.

I'm probably seeing her tomorrow and I'm going to avoid any kisses/touching/etc. and say something like, "Someone else has been there recently" and see if she'll finally break out and explain.

Should I try talking to the guy and ask him why he did it too?

I really want to forgive, but I don't think I'll be able to... unless maybe both of them apologize but I doubt.. who does that? Any thoughts or similar experiences?