Quote:
Originally Posted by candy1
Hello,
Need some advice and perspective 
I recently broke up with my bf of almost a year. Throughout the relationship he was always very honest about his views on drugs (can open your mind, good conversations etc as long as not abused.) However, I've always been concerned about his use of coke esp if we are getting serious.
I know prior to us he partied most days of the week. Once we got into a relationship he stopped partying really and we spent most of our time together. I know he put in a lot of effort to make me happy. Though my best guess is that he would probably still use it once a week on average.. pretty much if he goes out/drinks. I never gave him shit for it but personally choose to not be around that environment.
Doesn't seem like its affected his life in terms of career but he says that he probably has 3g a week and obvs inevitably shares with some friends (he says his use has dramatically cut down from before).
I've NEVER tried and don't plan on it. We got in a bad fight and brought up all these issues (the drug use was a concern among others). one of the things he said was that he has cut down a lot since us dating, he wants to have a family with me and will give it all up.
Sometimes I feel like he can be a little bit manipulative.. Considering whether to give it a chance. I miss him and love him.. but I need to know if this is just me being blind. I want to be in for the long haul.
Since I know nothing about the drug.. Is this amount a lot/considered an addiction? Would he really be able to stop or more likely to just hide it from me? He says it's common, I shouldn't need to be this against it and calls it an excuse and gets angry.
Thanks so much for reading! |
If you are willing to be the intervention and can handle it on your own without airing your issues to friends/family/others, give it a second chance.
Because as soon as you get back and air your issues to and decide to ask 10 people, 33% will say leave, 33% will say stay, 33% will say do what makes you happy.
also color coded phrases from original post that are just 
__________________
Sometimes we tend to be in despair when the person we love leaves us, but the truth is, it's not our loss, but theirs, for they left the only person who couldn't give up on them.
Make the effort and take the risk..
"Do what you feel in your heart to be right- for you'll be criticized anyway. You'll be damned if you do, and damned if you don't." - Eleanor Roosevelt
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