[quasi]

I've never been great at negotiating raises. Typically I'm pretty easy as long as I feel I'm being treated fairly.

I've been at the same company for 6 years, we're suppose to have yearly reviews but that typically doesn't happen unless I demand them. I have had somewhat regular raises over the years.

Last February I received a raise around 6% which I understand is more then inflation and overall probably considered good. The problem I have is I know other people in the same industry as me in similar positions from a handful of different companies who are making 20-25% more then I am currently. My company likes to quote what there paying other people in other offices in my same role but IMO it's not fair to compare me to someone working in Calgary or Edmonton where it's a lot cheaper to buy a home.

To make it more complicated I have two offers on the table right now that are closer to that 25% more one is from our competitor here in the lower mainland and the other is from the company my dad works for back in Saskatchewan. It would be nice to be mortgage free in Sask but then I'd have to live there year round so I don't think I'm taking the offer seriously.

I've had some challenges this year with knee surgery/recovery and then the death of my sister and my work has been very understanding and accommodating, I put a lot of value to that. Generally speaking I really like the people here as well, I love my commute and I don't want to leave. I want to get closer to market value but I don't want to seem like I'm bending them over. What is the best way to approach my boss without pissing him off and coming off greedy?

I don't even mind taking a little less to stay here but that's a lot of money to leave on the table year after year.

Any advice is appreciated.