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Originally Posted by EvoFire
Spoiler!
This is effectively what happened with us. My grandma on her 2nd stroke wasn't doing the greatest, with some early signs of alzheimer's, her unwillingness to do physio treatments, and overall lack of will to live, she just wasn't recovering. My parents were still working, brother is working, and I've moved out.
The thing that bursted the dam was when she tried to commit suicide while no one was home. She was in the hospital for 3 months because we just couldn't provide adequate care at home and there's no way we could prevent a suicide from happening again.
They fast tracked her to a care home. She ended up at Fraserview. It's a horrible place to be at these care homes. It's like being in a low security prison with unlimited visitation rights. The only bright spot for my grandma was when we visited. Her condition deteriorated very quickly in the last 3 years and she passed away in September this year.
When she first moved there, the place indeed smelled like piss all the time, people screaming, hot in the summer cold in the winter, dreary beige walls, depressing aura, all in one. Two years in the new building was built and it became a lot nicer, but still doesn't change the fact that it's like a low security prison.
To be clear, it wasn't covid that took her. I'm sad she's no longer here, but in some ways glad that she's no longer suffering. Covid meant we can no longer visit her and her only bright spot in the world was taken away. Her sphere of attention just wasn't big enough to be able to acknowledge us when we went to see her through the glass windows.
We got to see her before she passed away because they had to send her to the hospital for a medical condition. I saw her smile for the first time in a long while when I visited and talked to her for an hour at the hospital. She passed away 3 days after they sent her back to the care home. I believe that maybe she got to see us again and she was happy to go.
Yeah covid sucks. Care homes are bad places to be. Covid just makes it that much worse. I understand they need to protect these high risk residents from the big bad disease, but at the same time it's gray because you are almost taking everything worth living for away from these people who are stuck there.
Sorry for the long winded post. I'm just going through a rough patch in life right now, but I'm sure everyone is in someway or another.
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Definitely empathize with you on that.
My mom passed a couple years back in one of these places. George Pearson care facility. Lot of paraplegics among other disorders. Not a nice facility by any stretch.
When I'd talk with some of the residents (the ones who were capable) I was surprised how many of them would rarely, if ever, get visits from family. Even when they weren't far. Some hadn't seen them in years. Just heartbreaking.