I hear you, dating is hard for everyone but for different reasons.
I find the women in my life aren't struggling for attention, they're struggling to find fit, safety, and life alignment.
On finances, you gotta date like your hot girl friends: throw your opinions out there, ask questions that are kinda testy and see what comes back to you. A few things I have fun with:
Talk about travel and group trips because it not only makes for a fun convo, you'll get one of the three responses:
-
Red flag "My friend Darong kept suggesting L places for the ski trip! It didn't have a butler or an onsen in the room so I didn't even wanna go, ew."
-
Yellow flag "I get anxious about overspending, ugh my friend kept wanting to stay at the W. I'll pay for safety/location."
-
Green flag "Yeah! I made friends in London/Hawaii and I love visiting them with gifts, so I'll usually stay with them and give them a great experience when I travel. You should meet Sophie when we go to Paris"
Talk about fashion, women love talking about it: mention you thrifted some dope stuff in Japan and found Birkins there too.
-
Red flag "My ex was so stingy! I just wanted a Kelly and he wouldn't even take me to the Hermes store"
-
Yellow flag "These Manolos are terrible, they were 800 and they fell apart after one day!"
Role play:
"I feel like you're the kind of girl I could take to dinner in heels but also hit the McDonalds drivethru with at 2AM"
If $5k landed in your lap - would you rather invest in a handbag, book a flight to South Africa, or donate to a pet shelter. You're just opened up 3 more conversation topics here.
-
Green flag "Por que no los dos"
State your plan: "I'll get the dinner, you'll take us to your favourite dessert spot and treat us"
-
Green flag "Deal, I know the perfect gelato place... but if you're a mint chocolate man, this is never gonna work out"
AND If they're giving you shit, you can share your opinion in a flirty way..
"oh but are you a generous man"
depends on who's asking
"why don't you get this for me, after all I'm pretty aren't I"
what is this a charity? I love dog shelters tho and especially huskies, what's your favourite dog
"i only do dinner on the first date"
isn't it boring having to carry a whole conversation? i have so much more fun doing activity dates, we'll grab food along the way, and we'll grab dinner for the second date if we vibe
"you're not a 50/50 man are you"
I'm not counting but I'm very persuadable by effort... be careful what you ask for"
"I'm a 100/100 guy, wouldn't life be so boring if we didn't spoil each other?"
What might blow your mind is half the time I ask a girl what she's looking for, no matter what she says, I'll give the same answer and they always go "exactly!!! finally someone gets it"
> I'm only looking for a relationship
Me:
Same, looking to vibe with someone cool and date them a while if they're really cool.
I literally think the word "same" really gets them