Quote:
Originally Posted by spoon.ek9
It's not too surprising to be honest. Women have been telling each other what to demand from men and spend zero time talking about what they could/should do for their man.
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Sounds like insecurity. The more someone's focused on external factors, the more likely it is that they're compensating for a lack of trust in themselves.
Quote:
Originally Posted by spoon.ek9
Even when I asked my friend (who's married with kids) what she brings to the table, she couldn't give me an answer. She's a good mom, she's smart pharmacist, cooks elaborate Chinese meals, and takes care of her husband when needed. Those are all excellent traits to have in a wife. But for her to actually sit down and think about any of that was just drawing blanks in her mind.
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Doesn't that seem right though? Imo if anyone's spending any conscious time counting up with all the ways they're contributing, it just drives up the likelihood that they'd turn around and think "wait a minute... but what is everyone else doing for me, in return?"
Out of limited time and energy - trying to make it through a hard enough life as it is - it seems an unnecessary burden to think about a relationship as a series of ledgers.
I think a healthier way to think about things, is "what more could I do?", rather than "what am I already doing?".