The Modern Dating Thread

[SSM_DC5]

He doesn't own any shirts. What you see is all he's got, but it's more than enough for the ladies (to share? Dude has so many side chicks I can't keep up)

[spoon.ek9]

Mike is getting the kind of attention I saw in HK and then some

It truly is exhausting dealing with apps but like I told Mike, the amount of interest he's getting is not the norm for vast majority of guys here. I specifically remember my friend telling me about her brother getting literally zero matches on apps.

[roastpuff]

I just want more pics of Mona, she's a cutie!

[GS8]

Originally Posted by mikemhg

I agreed months ago to do this designated driver service with a cop buddy of mine once or twice a week on a Friday or Saturday night to keep myself distracted. It's been interesting and easy side cash, but now I regret agreeing to it, dates, plus job, plus side gig, and regular life is getting to be too much.

Man, I am looking for a weekend only side job for the summer. They still looking for drivers or anything related?

Granted, I'm not refrigerator shaped, more tripod shaped, but I support designated drivers.

[BIC_BAWS]

Originally Posted by spoon.ek9

I specifically remember my friend telling me about her brother getting literally zero matches on apps.

Pretty much me in Vancouver LOL.

But I also don't use it as much anymore. Open to swipe a few times maybe once every 3 weeks?

[red kryptonite]

Originally Posted by donk.

[SPOILER]



Thats because they can smell the fact that you are taken (your taken right?), and women love a man thats taken

alright, tip for ya'll single guys: wear a wedding ring to the bar and see how you do.

Originally Posted by spoon.ek9

Mike is getting the kind of attention I saw in HK and then some

man, the gf was with me the entire time i was in china/hk.
dropped all that weight for nothing jk

[Badhobz]

Originally Posted by mikemhg

You older guys -- stay married This dating stuff is way different in your mid 30s or 40s, the small talk is redundant and not exciting, you also become atrophied to choice at an older age, and more skeptical of people.

FUZZY !!!! i miss my fuzzies. Doggies are the best! people are trash.

Youre damn right about that Mikey. The older i get the less i wanna talk to these hoes. The less i wanna talk to these hoes, the more interested they seem in talking to me for some reason. Life works in mysterious ways.

As ive stated numerous times before. if i was single id never date again. Talking with these dumb cunts about their horseshit lives is a war crime to me. Its Geneva convention breaking torture. OMG, YOU LIKE HANDBAGS AND DESIGNER SHIT!? BUT YOURE BROKE AND RENT WITH 4 ROOMMATES!?!??! DO TELL ME MOAR!!!!

I much rather pay numerous prostitutes and then die from syphilis afterwards. great way to go!!

[BIC_BAWS]

Originally Posted by Badhobz

The less i wanna talk to these hoes, the more interested they seem in talking to me for some reason. Life works in mysterious ways.

This actually makes sense tho. Hoes are used to having all men follow them around / chase them, ranging from a bunch of hot guys to anyone they consider "lower" than them. So by not giving them attention, it piques their interest as they're wondering what you got going on that doesn't make you want to talk to them.

[68style]

Go start ignoring every girl you meet, I’ll see you alone at the lansdowne food court playing Keno in 20 years hahaha

What they’re really attracted to is Hobz’s idgaf attitude which means they can smell the money and not the reek of desperation and barely hanging on most guys are giving off lol

[Badhobz]

sounds wonderful! lets start a old man's group!

[BIC_BAWS]

Originally Posted by mikemhg

I'm finding it challenging to fit in second dates, you go on the first one, they want to go on another one ASAP, it's taxing on the social battery, not only that, it adds up financially.

This is kind of what I'm experiencing too.. cause I don't actually want to hang out with anyone that much LOL. I find it taxing to have to look at my calendar, figure out a time, figure out date plans.. man its so much work LOL.

That said, Date #3 - went for a walk around Steveston, checked out some boutiques, had some Timothy's, grabbed dinner. $20/pp. Solid.

I am however encountering a problem.. well good problem to have I guess. I can tell that she likes me a lot, which I'm learning that it's making me avoidant on this. It's not that I don't like her, but I think it's moving a little too quickly in the feelings/attachment department and that's concerning. Reminds me of an ex and that was a disconnect of push/pull dynamics - she always felt like I didn't like her as much as she liked me.

I'm having a difficult time deciding if I should be a responsible mature adult (probably this), communicate that it's moving a little fast for me and leave the ball in her court or leaving it until she brings it up and it's a "fight" LOL

[68style]

Why is this even a question? If you don’t like her dump her. You said you did but you clearly don’t form the other comments, at least not as more than a friend.

If you ain’t got butterflies and eagerness first 3 dates it’s not going to grow into that over years. Why are you literally trying to plan out the timing of your first fight? That’s ridiculous.

[bcrdukes]

Originally Posted by BIC_BAWS

Reminds me of an ex and that was a disconnect of push/pull dynamics - she always felt like I didn't like her as much as she liked me.

I'm having a difficult time deciding if I should be a responsible mature adult (probably this), communicate that it's moving a little fast for me and leave the ball in her court or leaving it until she brings it up and it's a "fight" LOL

You may need to build a decision tree and a dashboard with real-time KPIs.

[Badhobz]

keep going bro!!! maybe she's good in bed? dump her afterwards okay?

[spoon.ek9]

ok, I'll share this story.

I was part of a new group of friends (sports related) and developed interest in one of the girls. Made it super obvious I was interested, kept getting the cold shoulder. Eventually, something benign happened and this girl actually pulled me aside one day to demand an apology from me. For the sake of the group and being the bigger person, I did. However, I decided in that exact moment I now have zero interest in her. One of my friends from the group (female) unbeknownst to me, eventually told her I've moved on. This drove her crazy and almost instantly she tried her hardest to get my attention. Why? Because a girl like her doesn't often hear that she can't have what she wants.

We had a cabin trip planned for Whistler and this had been discussed long before this incident. I knew we would end up being alone a lot because neither of us had much interest in skiing/snowboarding. Last minute, I bailed on the trip because I legit wanted nothing to do with that situation. She had a terrible time from what I was told lol. This in itself is another good story.

Fast forward a few months and we were supposed to go clubbing with the group. I bail again. Fast forward to her birthday dinner, I show up but bail on the idea of spending time afterwards to do board games or whatever it was. Pretty funny dinner as one of the girls' bf at the time completely ruined the dinner by suggesting she eats like a dog with all the things she had ordered that night. Gold.

Now, this whole time we're still playing sports together with the group on a weekly basis. There was one particular night where, in full makeup, she walked straight up to me extra close to say hi. I thought this was peculiar but said hi and thought nothing more of it. Also, because I had moved on, I would occasionally have new dates come and watch me as I played with the group. This of course drove her crazy too. One time, I offered my jacket to one of the girls because it was cold and we were playing outdoors. This also drove her mad. Another time, one of the girls I was seeing started playing with us and when they were introduced to each other it was the coldest, funniest hand shake I've ever seen in my life.

Ok, old news now but fast forward about a year later. I'm having drinks at a friend's house, that girl isn't there. Guy friend accidently shares that "yeah, she got super drunk that night we were supposed to go clubbing and randomly blurted out: WHY DOESN'T (SPOON) WANT ME ANYMORE?!?" and my eyes just bulged because from what I knew, she wasn't interested at all. So I was like WHAT? And he sheepishly says "Oh... I thought we told you" That's when I learned about all this background info I shared above. I laughed my ass off about it because I was starting to put the pieces together with how she actually felt.

Fast forward even further and another female friend tells me even more about the situation. As it turns out, in the very beginning, this girl was going around telling her friends that this guy is totally in love with me and she's got me wrapped around her finger etc. To which I was again surprised to learn about her behaviour.

To summarize, rather than be honest and actually have a chance at a new relationship this girl instead gossiped to her friends about my interest, gave me the cold shoulder throughout me courting her, was told I'm no longer interested, lost her damn mind, tried to get my attention after the fact, got mad that I moved on, got mad that I was bringing new girls around.

So yes, ignoring girls does often make them interested in you. However, it's usually the type of girl you shouldn't keep around anyways. Having confidence to ignore a girl to a certain degree can be helpful though because it shows you aren't concerned if things go south with her.

[Badhobz]

WHY DOESNT SPOON WANNA SPOON ME ANYMORE!?!??!

Gold!!! i love it.

[BIC_BAWS]

Originally Posted by 68style

If you ain’t got butterflies and eagerness first 3 dates it’s not going to grow into that over years.

I wasn't sure if this is what a "securely attached" relationship should feel like - never been in a "normal" relationship, I've only seen (and like ) toxic - high energy, high tension, etc.

Originally Posted by spoon.ek9

was told I'm no longer interested, lost her damn mind, tried to get my attention after the fact, got mad that I moved on, got mad that I was bringing new girls around.

So yes, ignoring girls does often make them interested in you. However, it's usually the type of girl you shouldn't keep around anyways. Having confidence to ignore a girl to a certain degree can be helpful though because it shows you aren't concerned if things go south with her.

Like this for example.. I love this dynamic LUUUUUL.. im definitely the problem

Originally Posted by 68style

If you ain’t got butterflies and eagerness first 3 dates it’s not going to grow into that over years.

Anyway, I think endearment or attraction does grow.. or maybe I'm just doing whatever I need to do to get my dick wet, as that's what happened in a past relationship. I just don't want to make someone feel like they're not enough (or not attractive enough), which is what happened with an ex.

Tho I guess maturing is knowing that breaking it off or communicating my concerns, is better than letting her develop stronger feelings for me and always feeling anxious about my feelings towards her.

Originally Posted by Badhobz

keep going bro!!! maybe she's good in bed? dump her afterwards okay?

Haven't got to this part and I kinda don't want to find out.. and then break her heart.

[unit]

Originally Posted by BIC_BAWS

That said, Date #3 - went for a walk around Steveston, checked out some boutiques, had some Timothy's, grabbed dinner. $20/pp. Solid.

took me a while to realize you werent just trying to class up tim hortons

[Mikoyan]

Originally Posted by Badhobz

sounds wonderful! lets start a old man's group!

Wait. Isn't this what RS is now?

[mikemhg]

Originally Posted by GS8

Man, I am looking for a weekend only side job for the summer. They still looking for drivers or anything related?

Granted, I'm not refrigerator shaped, more tripod shaped, but I support designated drivers.

PM me. It's in Vancouver region only though, aren't you in AB?

[BIC_BAWS]

Originally Posted by unit

took me a while to realize you werent just trying to class up tim hortons

Me liking to do low-effort date activities as a "win" but also it's kinda feeling like friend dates.. but I have more fun with my (female) friends in terms of vibes.

[EvoFire]

Originally Posted by BIC_BAWS

This actually makes sense tho. Hoes are used to having all men follow them around / chase them, ranging from a bunch of hot guys to anyone they consider "lower" than them. So by not giving them attention, it piques their interest as they're wondering what you got going on that doesn't make you want to talk to them.

This energy has always been what works.

Back in university, my age cohort would go clubbing (not really a thing with the current crop it seems). Anyways, was told to go grind girls and all that which I did for one night and honestly did not enjoy it and I don't think anyone did.

Subsequently I went with a mindset of just hanging out. A few guys hanging out, being dumb trying to act like we know how to breakdance but realistically making a damn fool out of ourselves and just having a great laugh at each other's expense. That's when the girls kind of circle around and now were interested, and some of us got drinks as well.

What guys go clubbing and get reverse treated drinks?

[donk.]

Originally Posted by 68style

Why is this even a question? If you don’t like her dump her. You said you did but you clearly don’t form the other comments, at least not as more than a friend.

If you ain’t got butterflies and eagerness first 3 dates it’s not going to grow into that over years. Why are you literally trying to plan out the timing of your first fight? That’s ridiculous.

A hole is a hole.

[BIC_BAWS]

Originally Posted by EvoFire

Subsequently I went with a mindset of just hanging out. A few guys hanging out, being dumb trying to act like we know how to breakdance but realistically making a damn fool out of ourselves and just having a great laugh at each other's expense. That's when the girls kind of circle around and now were interested, and some of us got drinks as well.

What guys go clubbing and get reverse treated drinks?

Yeah I was at a karaoke event not too long ago and I was jamming out, having a good time, not really focused on any of the girls in the room. Then one of the hot girls in the room started getting really touchy with me and wanting me to sing with her. Grew the balls to ask for her number, but it hasn't really gone anywhere since rip gg go next.

[mikemhg]

Originally Posted by BIC_BAWS

This is kind of what I'm experiencing too.. cause I don't actually want to hang out with anyone that much LOL. I find it taxing to have to look at my calendar, figure out a time, figure out date plans.. man its so much work LOL.

That said, Date #3 - went for a walk around Steveston, checked out some boutiques, had some Timothy's, grabbed dinner. $20/pp. Solid.

I am however encountering a problem.. well good problem to have I guess. I can tell that she likes me a lot, which I'm learning that it's making me avoidant on this. It's not that I don't like her, but I think it's moving a little too quickly in the feelings/attachment department and that's concerning. Reminds me of an ex and that was a disconnect of push/pull dynamics - she always felt like I didn't like her as much as she liked me.

I'm having a difficult time deciding if I should be a responsible mature adult (probably this), communicate that it's moving a little fast for me and leave the ball in her court or leaving it until she brings it up and it's a "fight" LOL

Isn't it annoying? I need my space and alone time, the back to backs is draining. I was talking to one I like and offered a second date for this weekend and she goes "why do we have to wait until the weekend?", I'm thinking to myself because I got x and y Mon-Fri, what's the bloody rush?

How do you keep doing these cheap charlie dates? Do you give them a hard end time? The last few ones I've been on we ended up shutting the place down until 12AM or 2AM, so an easy $200 bill on drinks.